life really does go on

hey guys..

sorry i haven't posted in a while, i have no excuse

yeh i miss you all..

so sometimes things happen and we feel upset..and sometimes people misunderstand us and question the kind of people we are .. and the problem behind that is that the ones we want in our lives may not always trust us or feel that we're good enough for them .. sometimes we do stupid things and sometimes we're just being ourselves..

i'm putting in a lot of general statements and most of the time i rarely make sense but here's the truth of the matter .. some people have an overwhelming effect on us.. and my god i need to pull it together

ok right now

RIGHT NOW

i'm frustrated with myself, you wanna know why? i'll tell you why god damn it, i am frustrated because i let all kinds of things get to me with both new and old people and its like WHY do i put myself through this? WHY do i let myself get affected so much? WHY am i this damn sensitive i hate it!!!

i wanna wake up someday and i wanna be freed up from all this damn emotion that really messes me up all the time, i wanna be someone so strong that can face anything without having a single tear forming in my eyes

i cry in a heartbeat and i need that to stop it seriously bothers me because life doesn't stop once you start crying, it goes on, and that idea upsets me even more because its like when i'm sad i need some kind of consolation i need to know that there is something that will change about whats upsetting me but the truth of the matter is nothing ever changes, you're upset now because you don't know how to get over the fact that life will constantly find new ways to screw you over and you can cry about it all you want but life sure as hell won't stop for anybody.

i'm done