the truth behind expectations

hey guys
how are we all? good? good

now i wanna get straight to the point because this is gonna be one of those posts where i just totally express myself (but, aren't all my posts like that? hmm that's a good question) anyway, but no with this particular post it'll be sort of a general expression about something i have an opinion about rather than something specific..does that make sense? it actually sounds stupid when i try to explain it, my point is THIS POST IS UNIQUE, KAY? (i love you) alright! let's get straight to it.

i'm gonna talk about expectations, now if you read my tweets regularly you're gonna notice how i have this firm belief that expectations suck and that they always hurt and shit like that, and the reality is i do believe that but the problem is, i go on and i contradict myself almost on a daily basis you guys because even though i HATE expectations, i have them all the time, in the most unrealistic kind of way, see i expect people to go out of their way to see to it everything going in is A okay, i expect people to put in 110% effort into everything they do whether it was for me or for something else, i expect people to be basically good. and see that's the biggest mistake anyone can make because none of that is true, i'm not a total cynic you guys but seriously, how many times have your expectations been ACTUALLY met, as opposed to the times they haven't? seriously ask yourself

i won't get into too much details but recently i faced an extreme disappointment and i guess i'm still in the process of shaking it off, but the thing is, the pain from unmet expectations lingers because you have to face those people who disappointed you most times, and everytime you face them, the disappointment and hurt they caused you comes rushing back..and that's what makes it stay and hurt even more..

what makes it harder for me is that, unfortunately, i'm the kind of person who doesn't let things go, if you did something bad to me 2 years ago, chances are, i still remember, darling. and i won't resent you for it nor will i treat you badly, but it's like in my head there's this like little file for each person i've known and faced issues with, and in that file everything you did is stored, i don't want to scare anyone off or make them think i'm some angry witch, but the reality is we have to remember the way people did us wrong before so we don't allow them to do it again, because the first time they did it was because we didn't know better, but if we DID know better and we LET them run over us again, wouldn't that make us stupid?

think about that, because i know you lot aren't stupid, in fact your level of awesomeness is increasing by the SECOND! until next time.